Article by Kyle Borg (original source here)

I’m not certain but I suspect that if you asked a pastor what discourages him most, a common answer given would be the inactive member. By inactivity I don’t mean only those who are habitually absent, but also the member who merely warms a seat but does little to participate in the life, service, and especially the worship of the church. But it’s not only a great discouragement for a pastor (and congregation), it is also a good reason for concern. An inactive member is one of the sheep that has gone astray and requires the shepherd to leave the ninety-nine to go after the one.

As I thought about this, here’s what I’d like to say to the inactive member —:

Dear Friend,

I wanted to write you a letter of encouragement. I’ve noticed lately that you haven’t been as present in the life and worship of the congregation as you once were. I understand that there are many things in life that detract or hinder us from being as active as we should be, and maybe we just need a bit of a nudge in the right direction. In fact, it’s a temptation that the Bible encourages us against: “Let us hold fast the confession of our hope without wavering, for he who promised is faithful. And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works, not neglecting to meet together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another, and all the more as you see the Day drawing near” (Hebrews 10:23-25). So with that in mind let me encourage you to not neglect the life, service, and worship of the church.

First, I want to encourage you because God is worthy. When we meet week-by-week to worship God we don’t do it because it’s tradition or mere formality. Rather, we do it because God is worthy to be worshiped: “Worthy is the Lamb who was slain,to receive power and wealth and wisdom and might and honor and glory and blessing!” (Revelation 5:12). When we come together in worship — as God wants us to do — we are saying “You are worthy!” But when you don’t come to worship because you don’t feel like it, or you’re too busy, or you’d rather do something else, you are telling God “You’re not worthy.” God is worthy of being worshiped, loved, and served by you.

Second, I want to encourage you because the church is a body. Paul wrote: “For as in one body we have many members, and the members do not all have the same function, so we, though many, are one body in Christ, and individually members of one another” (Romans 12:4-5). By the Holy Spirit we’re not only united to Jesus but to one another. When you’re not participating in the life, service, and especially the worship of the church we feel your absence. We value you — your presence, service, gifts, and graces. To put it this way, when you’re not with us we’re not complete but we’re a body that is missing a part.

Third, I want to encourage you because of your spiritual growth. God doesn’t intend Christians to grow all by themselves. Rather, we are to grow together. Again, Paul wrote that we have the ministry of the church so that “we all attain to the unity of the faith and of the knowledge of the Son of God, to mature manhood, to the measure of the stature of the fullness of Christ” (Ephesians 4:13). I’m afraid to say it, but it’s a biblical assumption that your inactivity means you’re not growing spiritually. You’re not growing in a love for God or for your neighbor; you’re not growing in your knowledge and understanding of the things of God. This isn’t a good place to be and we don’t want you to be there.

Fourth, I want to encourage you because of the wiles of Satan. Peter wrote: “Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour” (1 Peter 5:8). I don’t know a lot about the habits of lions, but I do know that they prey on those who are detached from the herd. I worry that in being inactive and not participating you’ve separated yourself from the herd and have become easy prey for Satan — his lies, flaming darts, and temptations. There’s a reason that just before this Peter wrote “Be alert.” We don’t want you to be resisting the devil all on your own, that’s why God has given you to us and us to you.

Fifth, I want to encourage you because of mutual edification. Even Paul who was an Apostle wanted and needed to be with the church. To the congregation in Rome he wrote: “For I long to see you, that I may impart to you some spiritual gift to strengthen you — that is, that we may be mutually encouraged by each other’s faith, both yours and mine” (Romans 1:11-12). You’re a member of this church and you’re also a friend and family member in Jesus. We want to have opportunities to edify you and also to be edified by you.

Sixth, I want to encourage you because of joy. In writing to a church John said: “Though I have much to write to you, I would rather not use paper and ink. Instead I hope to come to you and talk face to face, so that our joy may be complete” (2 John 1:12). Everyone wants to be happy, glad, and joyful. The Bible reminds us that we find joy in the face to face presence of one another. That is to say, you contribute to our joy when you are present and we contribute to yours.

Finally, let me encourage you because of the promises you made. When you became a member of this church you promised to throw your weight into this congregation — your devotion, service, influence, encouragement, and help. You and I know both know what it’s called when we’re not true to our word. Would you allow me to ask: were you being honest when you made that promise?

We all need encouragement from time to time to not quit but to keep with it. I hope you know that just as you need us, so we need you: “And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works, not neglecting to meet together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another, and all the more as you see the Day drawing near.”

In Jesus,
Your Pastor

Article by Ricky Alcantar (original source here)

I’m sure my parents talked to me about how important the church was in our lives. I’m sure they explained that because we love Jesus we love his people. I’m sure they explained that this was clear in the Bible.

But I don’t remember any of that.

Instead, this is what I remember: as long as I could remember, every other week, a bunch of people would invade our house, eat our food, and leave.

Our church small group was ingrained into our schedule like doctors appointments and Christmas Eve at Nana’s and dad’s work day. I’m sure my parents preached the theology of the church to me, but what I really listened to as a kid was how they preached their theology through the way they used their time.

I didn’t understand what the church was, or why it was important, but I got that it was important. Well, important enough for me to spend Wednesday afternoon helping get the house ready and Thursday morning cleaning up.

Take for example, what 1 Peter 2:4-5 says about the church:

As you come to him, a living stone rejected by men but in the sight of God chosen and precious, you yourselves like living stones are being built up as a spiritual house.

I couldn’t explain the metaphor of the verse to you as a 10-year-old, but I understood something: when my mom and dad met Jesus they started living differently. And part of living differently meant building their lives into other people, so much so that when other people hurt we hurt, when other people rejoiced we rejoiced, and when people left it was hard for all the right reasons.

I have kids of my own now, ages 2 and 4. All the four-year-old understands about church is that if you get there early there are donuts, that you have to wait for four songs before you can go to class, and that afterward, you can’t run on the stage. I talk to him whenever I can about the truths of 1 Peter 2 in a way he’d understand, but I’m comforted knowing that while he may not remember the conversations, he’ll remember our rhythm of life.

Whether you realize it or not, you’re teaching your kids a theology of the church with your time.

Here are some of the messages they can hear from us:

The church is important, just not as important as kids activities
We might think that we’re serving our kids by prioritizing their activities or sports over church, but in reality, we’re speaking loudly about priorities.

In his book Gospel-Powered Parenting, Bill Farley shares a story of a family that always made church activities secondary to their kid’s activities and then were surprised when they wandered from the church in their college years:

Mom and dad taught them well. Church was not important. God was not at the center of their lives. What really mattered were their children’s activities. Ken and Jackie had placed their children, and their success, on the throne of the family. Their children had heard the message, understood it, and imitated it.

The church is important, just not as important as mom and dad’s more important things
When work or hobbies take precedence over the church, the kids notice. The message is that the church is one important thing that sometimes gets pushed out by more important things.

Now I’m not saying there’s never an excuse to miss church. My dad had to work Sundays sometimes growing up (no way around it), but then he was even more intentional about us getting together with church people during the evening. I could see him straining to stay connected and it said something to me.

The church is important, just not as important as comfort and convenience
One of the most common reasons I hear from people who don’t make it to the Sunday gathering is that “There’s just a lot going on” or “We had a really busy weekend.” And really, I do judge that charitably–because I really don’t know the exact circumstances in most cases.

But if the family only goes to church when it’s not “inconvenient” and when everyone is feeling “100%” they won’t make it often at all. And “not often” has a funny way of becoming “not usually” and then “never.”

There have been sleepless nights with a newborn after which my wife Jenn didn’t make it to church, so I get that. But there have been a lot more sleepless nights she’s made it. Why? Because we as a family want that rhythm built into our life as a family and that little buddy’s life, too.

The church is important, important enough that we sacrifice for it
When you’ve had a busy weekend and you make it to church, your kids notice. When you rearrange athletic obligations to get to church, your kids notice. When you get in late from a trip Saturday night and make it to church, your kids notice. When you are willing to slog through traffic after work to make it to a small group meeting where the snacks aren’t amazing and the fellowship is a little forced but you do it anyway, your kids notice.

We have one guy who regularly plays on our worship team even after staying up till 2am most Saturdays because of his job. That says something to his kids. I want to say the same thing to my kids.

Now please, don’t misread this as legalism. Church attendance doesn’t save anyone, Jesus saves. Church attendance won’t save your kids, only Jesus can. But part of imparting a love for Jesus to our kids means imparting a love for Jesus’ family, the church. If we tell our kids one thing about the church and undermine it with our time, they’re sharp enough to get the message.

So what are you preaching about the church to your kids? What is your time preaching to them?

I heard simple truths like this read as a kid: “Once you were not a people, but now you are God’s people; once you had not received mercy, but now you have received mercy” (1 Peter 2:10 ESV).

I couldn’t grasp how huge those words were–that once we were without a people but because of what Jesus has done we’ve become God’s people. But I knew this: we had a people and we saw our people on Sunday mornings and during the week at small group and sometimes unexpectedly when they showed up crying and sometimes in the hospital when they were sick.

They were our people. I heard that loud and clear.

Four Helpful Articles:

Why the Local Church Really Matters by Tim Challies at this link.

Church Membership – Like A Marriage by J.V. Fesko at this link.

When Should I Leave My Church by Tim Challies at this link.

How To Leave A Church by Eric Davis at this link.