Martin Salter is assistant pastor at Grace Community Church, unforced way)
2. Ask friends about their faith – and just listen!
3. Listen to your friends problems – maybe offer to pray for them
4. Share your problems with others – testify to how your faith helps you
5. Give them a book to read
6. Share your story
7. Answer objections and questions
8. Invite them to a church event
9. Offer to read the Bible with them
10. Take them to a Christianity explored course
What Keller also advises is that we (generally) start with 1-4. If people are interested and want to talk more you can move them to stages 5-7. If they’re still interested go on to stages 8-10. Sometimes people will want to go straight to 10, but often people start from way back and need some time to think and discuss things in a non-pressured way. We often think that only stages 8-10 count and invest all our energy there. TK suggests that to get people at stages 8,9,10 you have to put the work in at 1-4. Sometimes you’ll have to keep going round the loop multiple times.
TK suggests to leaders that we should aim to get 20% of our folk doing this (of course it should be 100% but let’s be realistic). If we do, we’ll see a steady stream of conversions over the long term, and sustainable church growth.
Hey brother, hope you are doing well! I understand this is a more relational way to evangelize, but I do have a question about #2 – should the friend share that he is an Atheist, a Mormon, a Jehovah’s Witness, a Muslim, a Roman Catholic, or one who is a Christian because they go to church and pay tithes every week, do you believe Tim Keller et al would suggest to “just listen!” and not point people to the Truth?
I also wonder where the Gospel is shared in steps 1-10. I suppose we can assume that would take place in #6, or hopefully in a Christ-centered, Gospel-focused book (#5), but ultimately I do not see any direction to confront people in their position before God and telling them of the only reconciliation to Him through Jesus Christ. Ultimately, where is the personal responsibility in this list for the Christian to personally communicate the Gospel with “the friend”? It seems to be more or less a beating-around-the-bush approach.
Looking forward to your thoughts, dear brother!
Hi Justin,
Yes, I would agree with you. I don’t know what Tim Keller would say but I am sure he would wish for the Gospel to be presented – exactly where in the process, I dont know. There is definitely the need to point people to the truth. I think the point being made (though probably one that needs to be expressed better than in the above summary) is that it is so important to actually show interest and listen to the person. So often Christians are notorious for NOT doing that. Yet the other side of this is that there should be a plan to get the gospel in front of people (however that is done).
I think the Gospel should become part of the conversation early on, and certainly in any material shared (book, DVD, etc..) and certainly in sharing our personal story. The story should include the Gospel and how it has affected us.
We are obviously talking here about “friendship evangelism” rather than street preaching and there is a difference. The street preacher does not have time to build friendships with those walking past. The man on his first day in a new job who walks in and announces to everyone in the office, “My name is Robert and you have violated God’s holiness and His wrath is against you therefore turn to Christ, the only Savior…” shows complete lack of understanding in human relationships, even though all he said would be true. The two forms of evangelism are entirely different, and yet it is often hard for those good at either one, to appreciate those who do evangelism differently.
I would agree with you 100% Justin.. in personal “friendship” evangelism we should get to the gospel as quickly as possible and also remember the need to really come alongside, listen and truly care for people. In this way, we earn the right to speak. As the saying goes, people dont care how much you know until they know how much you care.
“Friendship evangelism” should be exactly that – true friendship and true evangelism. A true friend will love a person enough to give them the gospel and love the gospel enough to be a true friend.